Sometimes a question comes to my mind , I should express my feelings to my crush but I can’t so today m gonna confess with all strangers (don’t think I am sick lover or etc 🙂 )
The day when I saw you first time was best day of my life , first day of my college and I was going to attend morning lecture ,I was much nurvous because I have crowd fear.i was moving out in porch that time at the corner of class room you were coming in my direction , firstly I did not pay attention but when you came next to me , I looked at you avidly .( All we know it’s human nature) but we crossed each other in a moment . But a image was still swimming into my eyes , two flickering eyes and beautiful face cut is still walking around in my mind believe me I really did not notice what dress you put up , what was the color of dress because of your magical eyes I was unable to think anything . But I thought it is just dream and I went to classroom , day spent well in class because of you , it will be exaggeration 🙂 .
Another day I saw you at library , I had no idea that I will meet you again but it was my luck , I was searching books from this shelf to other and a book heave into view , quickly I picked up , suddenly I paid attention to shelf , I was shocked because you were there infront of me and I was watching you from the small blank space of shelf , for a moment I thought it is my misconception but 2-3 second later I felt and said to me
“yes it is true , oh god she will think I am staring her or she will think I am flippant ”
but it was my doubt actually she were looking for book in that shelf and she was not able to watch me because that blank space was too small . Thank God but my heart was forcing me and telling that
“go man ! She is damn pretty go and watch her one more time , you should
suddenly a voice came to my ears.
“oh you bloody flippant ! Are you out of mind , why are you staring innocent girl if she is not your cup of tea “
this voice came from my mind and my legs wanted to say something , I tried to understand their voice .
“Please run away from here I am feeling tired and I can’t move there please let me leave from here ”
so I decided to move for my legs .
One day you were gossiping with your friends at college gate and i was entering again I found you and I noticed that you were laughing much , I had not reason to stop there so I moved into college , flash back were playing in my mind , smile was increasing your beauty 100 times more , for a moment my heart told me that
“my god please save me , I can’t watch ”
, my mind was still opposing my heart and told me
” man ! Control on your self ! If you watch her continuously , you will be get addicted so try to ignore her”.
At lunch time I was walking around in canteen area with friends and you were sitting there with your male friend , honestly I felt too much jealous this Time I don’t know why ? He was cuddling you , I felt sad not only sad it was heart broken
That time I told to my heart
” oh gosh! She already have bf “.
“may be he is her best friend ”
voice came from my heart.
I told to heart-
” then why he is cuddling like bf , also treating her like baby , no man you again trying to misguide me now i will never listen to your voice ”
. Heart was confused and mind spoke quickly
“look how much stupid you are , I was refusing you every time but you were ignoring my voice and now look at you , you are hurting your self , did you really think? that she will talk to you ? Are you a star or famous figure ? Why you did think that she will be mine ? Itold that please control your emotions but you always ignore me
I was silent for a moment and I try to defend my self and told to mind
” I knew that but I thought positively that she is single , you please stop scolding me I am not a criminal I am a human and it’s human nature , yes i admit that I attracted because of her eyes but you tell me , how many times ? I have done this mistake . Dude now why you are speechless reply to me ?_ you know very well, it was my first time otherwise I never notice any girl ,how can you say that I am not a star , yes I am not a star or famous figure of college but I can treat her like a feminist forever , sorry it is my wish only now it’s impossible “
Mind was speechless , heart comes between fight and spoke to me
“Man be positive ! At least you should try one time , how can you be sure that she is committed , man! you can’t accept your defeat easily , you thought so much about her then now why are you being negative ”
I replied to heart
” I agree with you that i m not trying to propose her but you tell me if I go to her then what will I speak to her ? I never meet also m stranger then how can I be positive . You are just flattering , I know she will not accept also she can be rude with me , god knows !”
Heart kept silent and mind was totally disturbed . I moved to classroom . . …
Thanks for reading my story
– Confused Thoughts